Slow burn

Imagine me wheeling the garbage bin across the road to the park and then transferring all the garbage bags from my bin into the park bin and then wheeling it back to my house. Then I go over to the car and check the scratch that I just put there a few minutes ago.

This is what my last weekend amounts to. Two days into the next week. A wild and whacky ordeal that, thankfully, only I know the details of. I’m starting to question just how much I can trust myself on my own…

__________

Subtlety in storytelling is a very difficult thing. And watching In the mood for love again yesterday made me appreciate just how effective subtlety is when you actually get what it’s all saying. There are few characters. The action is sparse. Very little actually happens on the screen and the conclusion rather dubious at best. But the resonance that such movies leave me with is often more powerful and longer lasting than any in-your-face material ever is. It’s cinema like only cinema can do. Movies where there is no way that the book can be better. So here are my five all-time favourite subtle films (because I can only remember five at the moment). A lot of people probably won’t even like these films due to the fact that they’re just too slow but they come highly recommended by me and other intellectual snobs like me. Just think of them as focused as opposed to panoramic. A slow burn as opposed to fireworks.

In the mood for love (2001)
Directed by Wong Kar-Wai
Starring Maggie Cheung, Tony Leung Chiu-Wai

You can count on me (2000)
Directed by Kenneth Lonergan
Starring Laura Linney, Mark Ruffalo, Matthew Broderick

Monster’s ball (2001)
Directed by Mark Forster
Starring Billy Bob Thornton, Halle Berry, Heath Ledger

Hana-Bi [aka Fireworks] (1997)
Directed by Takeshi Kitano
Starring Beat Takeshi

Le Samourai (1967)
Directed by Jean-Pierre Melville
Starring Alain Delon

The fact that four out of these five movies were made in the last five years leads me to believe that there are a lot more out there that I’ve just forgotten about. Maybe I’ll add to the list as I remember them. Anyone else think of any more?

Stand clear, doors closing

This is what I do during my lunch breaks. I write stuff.

Me good mate Mark has a nice little site which he uses for posting up song lyrics that he's written. Well so far, he's posted a grand total of one song... but you just know the rest is coming. Right Mark?

Anyway, his site and the upcoming John Mayer concert (which, I might add, I won't be able to attend) have inspired me to write my own 'quarter-life crisis' song. It's some of the lamest poetry I've ever come up with but it is just a pop song and I did only have half an hour or so. Well that's my excuse anyway. Actually, I kinda like it. So I don't even know what I'm talking about! As for the tune, I got no idea. Maybe someone else would wanna help. To start off though, I think any song to do with trains probably should have a country twang to it...

Time's a train

School’s out!
Oh God, that was six years ago.
Never mind the time in between.
But where the hell am I now?

Look out!
A new girl walks into my life.
Nah, it’s the same one, just a new face.
Well, maybe tenth time’s the charm eh?

Am I living a life or am I just stalling?
Am I doing it right or am I falling?

I say time’s a train that I haven’t yet got off
They say life’s insane but mine hasn’t lifted off
For now I’ll just enjoy the view
Til the champagne pops
Cos I don’t even know my stop.

Wake up!
It’s Groundhog Day. I look the same.
The hair. Some extra weight perhaps.
Maybe changed my clothes a couple times.

New papers, a new job
New shoes, a new car
New stories, a new friend
But the same old, same old life.

Am I living a life or am I just stalling?
Am I doing it right or am I falling?

I say time’s a train that I haven’t yet got off
They say life’s insane but mine hasn’t lifted off
For now I’ll just enjoy the view
Til the champagne pops
Cos I don’t even know my stop.

I say time’s a train that I haven’t yet got off
They say life’s insane but mine hasn’t lifted off
For now I’ll just enjoy the view
Til the champagne pops
Cos I don’t even know my stop.

Cos I don’t even know my stop.
Maybe I just won’t stop.

Who are you?!

– Hello?
– Hi xtn, do you know who this is?
– Er… no.
– Guess.
– No. Don’t make me guess. I hate guessing.
– Come on!
– No. I don’t wanna guess.
– If you don’t guess, I’m gonna hang up.
– OK. Bye.

That’ll teach her not to mess with me.

It was a few years ago and I can’t remember whether I ever found out who that was or not.

I don’t know what goes on in my head sometimes.

I mean, I can’t say that I’ll never do it again and I’m not saying they’d even remember this incident but for what it’s worth, to whoever it was that called me that day a few years back, I’m really sorry.

One day after

Ready for some melodrama?

I wanted to post something from the play but it’s kinda hard cos there’s not many solid chunks of text. Most of the dialogue consists of short one-liners (I guess as opposed to long one-liners?) and would just look funny on a blog. So I’ve picked out one of the few solid chunks I could find. It’s a (not so) little speech spoken by the main character (called Andy). Obviously this means that the following excerpt won’t be too indicative of the play’s overall tone but it should give a decent idea about the themes and writing style. This is the first edit. I think it’s even been changed already. I’m not sure. Can’t remember. Anyway, here it is.

...You know that part where you hug. You've hugged her a million times before but for some reason, this feels like the first time — like it's the only time. Well there was none of that. And the kiss. That first magical kiss. The longing. The expectations. And then the moment when all the longing and all the expectations just go out the window and there's just... well there was none of that either. Looking into each other's eyes and forgetting that the rest of the world exists. There was none of that. We were never so engrossed in each other that we don't even notice ourselves getting rained on. We weren't even getting rained on at all. We were in the library for God's sakes — an air-conditioned room. It wasn't even raining outside. I mean, not that it was a bright sunny day with cheerful chirping birds either. It was just a normal day. There was a little bit of wind. The sun was slightly covered by the clouds. It was just a normal day.

The problem is... the problem is that we live... wanting... and maybe even expecting it to be like it is in the movies. We toss the coin wanting it to fall one way. If it does, we act surprised but think that it was always meant to be that way. If it doesn't, then we suddenly act as if the gods were against us, even though we know full well that the chances of it falling one way was always gonna be just as likely as it falling the other way. It's like closing your eyes and actually expecting and even preparing yourself to be surprised when you open them. But sometimes... sometimes the biggest surprise is that there is no surprise. The biggest surprise is that when you open your eyes there is nothing in front of you that wasn't already there before you closed them.

I mean, when people say: "things will all turn out well in the end", what the hell does that mean? When does it end? If everything turns out well in the end, what happens one day after the end? Of course the end could mean when you die. But how well could everything possibly be when in the end, you’re dead?

Things just go on. Things happen. There are highs. There are lows. But they just go on. It all ends when you do die. And in the meantime, life just is.

Mundy Blog

I’m in a weird mood at the moment so I’m gonna write about really mundane stuff to balance it out.

Gluttony
I’ve been bad when it comes to my consumption habits. Last Saturday, I went to Lowenbrau and had a piece of crackling pork belly. Now if you haven’t had one of these, let me tell you, each bite is like eating a piece of meat and a spoonful of fat. It tastes wonderful but I suspect it may have shaved a couple of years off my life! This meal was washed down with a litre of the house mango beer. Following that, we trekked our way to Passionflower where I had waffles and two scoops of ice cream with maple syrup. The night ended with a couple more pints of beer (Guinness). Then it was game over. I had to wake up the next morning at 8am to play two games of basketball. Ahhh. The Life…

Basketball
My fitness is slowly coming back. I’d say its at about 80% at the moment. My skill level however is at about 60% at most. I don’t feel comfortable at all on the court. Don’t get me wrong. It’s not like I’ve ever been a dominant player, but I used to be able to do a few things — run a break, penetrate down the middle etc. Still we won one and lost one. I did jack all though.

Risk
I will never become a good general cos I do dumb things, like feel sorry for people. We played the board game Risk on Friday and I won the first game, but I didn’t win the second cos I waited too long to attack and when I did, I got a run of bad luck and lost. But still, we didn’t manage to finish the second game so I guess I won one more game than everyone else. Which also means I won infinitely more times than everyone else did. I can always rely on mathematics to cheer me up…

Play
We’re doing a marketing proposal now for the play. I’m still determined to not let this project die. I can tolerate having it postponed a couple of million times but I won’t tolerate its demise. I believe too much that what I wrote is something my target audience would devour quite readily. It’s a pretty good script. Even if I do say so myself. And I do!

Music
Until I learn the piano and become a rock star in the mould of Ben Folds, I’m just gonna have to indulge in other people’s music. Motor Ace is wasting away in Australia. They should be doing their all to get themselves over to America. Here, they’re not much more than a second string band. Over there, I think they could be big. Their kind of music thrives over there. Personally, they’re my favourite Aussie band and that’s saying a lot cos Aussie bands are at a very high standard at the moment. They remind me of the Gin Blossoms cos they sound so damn nice and even show glimmers of optimism. Which is a welcome change in a rock industry so saturated with angst. But as much as I like Motor Ace, I’ve realised that I’ve made up in my mind the list of my all-time favourite bands and no one new is ever likely to break in there (I watched High Fidelity quite later than everyone else so this list is only recently been compiled). My Holy Five are: del Amitri, Gin Blossoms, Counting Crows, Hootie and the Blowfish, and the Wallflowers. Only the Wallflowers have a chance to get replaced in the five.

More music
I went to buy Lifehouse’s new album but ended up walking home with Ryan Adams’ (not Bryan Adams) new one called ‘Demolition’. It’s basically a set of demos that he recorded while producing his critically acclaimed album ‘Gold’. This was meant to be a 60-song 3-CD set that he boasts he was able to write and record all within a year! Yikes! Luckily, it just ended up being an 11-song CD. Adams is a rude, arrogant bastard who gets away with all the crap because he makes fantastic music and gets to date Wynona Rider. He says stupid things like ‘my music is not influenced by country music at all’ when the country influences are probably one of the selling points of his music! But I love his stuff. He’s got that ‘mad genius’ thing going. I don’t know if any of you know what I’m talking about but I get the same vibes when I listen to guys like Ben Folds and Jeff Buckley. With these guys, even their bad songs are in a way special because they are infused with so much personality and passion. The only thing bad that I can say about his music is that structurally, he’s not all that adventurous. All his songs follow the same verse/chorus formula, which in a way doesn’t really make him any more sophisticated than any of the new teeny guitar poppers like Michelle Branch and co. But that may be a small matter.

Yikes! I didn’t realise I’d crapped on for so long. Oh well. Time to be weird again.

Complaints

It all went downhill after I let go of my hard-earned $15 just to get in to Martin Place Bar. And the girl at the register wasn’t even that cute!

I mean, it’s not the money. I don’t really care about $15 (regardless of the fact that I could buy 37.5 soft serves at Maccas for $15). It’s the principle. We all registered on the net so we could get in for free before 11pm. We then came an hour early just in case. They didn’t even end up letting us in til after 11!

Not impressed.

As for the party itself. It was standard. RnB music. Lots of Asians. White guys here and there picking up Asian girls. It was still fun. But I’m on whinge mode at the moment.

Now to a much more serious topic…

In the tradition of Angry Asian Man and Angry Asian Woman, I’m gonna become Somewhat Miffed Catholic Boy. OK, not quite as catchy I know, but seriously, things have got to change. Where to start…

I’m so sick of hearing about priest sex-abuse stories. And what’s worst, I’m sick of hearing about people being paid off to keep silent about it. The Church shouldn’t be trying to cover these things up. It’s out there anyway! Bad priests should be weeded out. There’s no excuse for sexually abusing little kids!

Of course, the problem goes further. No one even wants to become priests in the first place. There’s a shortage worldwide. So much so that many churches around the world have a priest rotation system so that mass is only held once every two weeks or so. There’s more Catholic communities than there are priests to cater for them. So I guess they don’t wanna get rid of too many priests, plus all the bad press about sex-allegations etc. etc.

There’s a problem here. In fact, there are lots of problems here.

Ergo

We need changes.

So here’s a couple of pieces of Catholic law that I feel should be revised at this time. And to avoid a blasting from ooee, I will attempt to keep this rant from being too biased.

1. Priests must be male
Reasons for: Jesus never chose any female Apostles. And when the priest is playing the part of Jesus during the Eucharist, it’s only right that he is male since Jesus was male.
My take: Jesus never chose any female Apostles because He was smart enough to realise that no one would take Him seriously if He was with a bunch of women. Even if He had chosen six of each, they’d just look like a travelling orgy band! Jesus needed credibility in an environment where everybody was looking to bring Him down. I don’t think it had anything to do with His opinion of women’s abilities to administer the faith. This law is archaic. We need more priests now and there are women who are willing (and more than able) to fill the roles. So why not have women priests?

2. Priests must remain celibate.
Reasons for: Keeps the mind pure and focused. If priests were allowed to marry, they’d have domestic distractions that could serve as deterrents to their life’s work.
My take: If priests are molesting kids, their minds are obviously not on their life’s work anyway! Priests are human beings. With natural instincts and urges. Some people can be fine being celibate their whole lives. Some can’t. For most people, such a restriction is too much to ask. You would find so many more people willing to consider priesthood without such restrictions on their personal lives.

I’m gonna leave this discussion here cos this is all the energy I’m allowing myself to expunge on the topic at this time. I realise that I haven’t given this the proper attention it requires and I know that I’ve over-simplified everything. But this is a blog. And this is all I wanna say right now.

Just like the good old days

I wake up this morning dead tired and feeling like I’d just eaten half an ox. But through the heavy eyelids and bloated stomach, I felt happy and rejuvenated!

You see, to me, there are two kinds of good nights you can have. Ones packed with significant events that you could tell people about and ones where nothing newsworthy actually happens but is good nonetheless for other reasons.

Last night was of the latter kind. Nothing significant happened but I’m gonna tell you about it anyway. Cos it’s probably the best ‘nothing’ night I’ve had since my days as an unemployed bum back in the summer of 99/00.

It begins in class where I spend almost three hours mucking around in Photoshop with zero results. And then Justin (a teacher) does something in fifteen minutes and blows me away! Wow! Now I’m inspired for tonight!

Next comes dinner. Or two dinners I should say. One at 9:30pm and another at 10:30pm. Yeah I know you’re not supposed to eat so much so late at night, but what am I supposed to do when I finish class and get a desperate urge for a Whopper with cheese (TM)? Say no?

At 10:45 I begin watching the second half of Biloxi Blues, one of my all-time favourite movies. And a bargain buy at $2.95 to boot! I’m surprised this movie never got much recognition. The dialogue (Neil Simon) is dead-on and Matthew Broderick and Christopher Walken are fantastic in it!

Anyway, the video finishes at midnight. Time for bed? I don’t think so! There’s a new series on Channel 9. It’s called FreakyLinks. Everybody go watch it! It’s fantastic! I would describe it as Press Gang meets the X-Files. It’s made by the people who produced Blair Witch and though it might be a little on the B-grade side (think script-sophistication of Charmed), it’s new, on late, has a supernatural edge and a slightly-underfed-but-attractive female lead that looks like this so I love it. A quick scan of the Net reveals that the show has already been cancelled a year ago though. Oh well. We still get one season of it to enjoy. I’ll file this under other late-night TV legends such as Dark Justice, Forever Knight, Silk Stalkings and The Nowhere man! Great shows that never got a chance.

FreakyLinks ends and I’m ready for bed. Then Dave Letterman come on and I’m like, aww, I like this show but I need to sleep. Then they announce the special guests and it’s Avril! Oh and David Schwimmer. But Avril’s gonna be there! Avril! So I stay on. This girl can do no wrong for me. She comes on, she’s like half the size of Letterman, acts like a 9-year-old kid, starts singing and sounding as bad as I do at karaoke and yet I’m still gonna love her! I’m still gonna write haikus about her!

And that is how my night ends. I then go to sleep and wake up at the top of this entry.

Life is wonderful.

Fantastic Avril
Just like Fantastic Noodles (TM)
Only not curly

*This entry has been brought to you by the word 'fantastic', the number '9' and the 'TM' sign.