You get up early this morning and find out it’s not really that early after all. You don’t feel the least bit refreshed and your mouth has a funny taste. It’s the asthma meds you took the night before. After all these years, you should be used to it by now.

At this point, you should probably go to the bathroom to relieve yourself. Or you could go back to sleep for a little while longer. It’s tempting. But the arse wants what the arse wants. And you go with it. And then you clean up after it. That’s always the way it goes.

Walking down Forest Road on a cool late weekend morning, your most pressing choice is whether to go for a pork roll or something not so entirely predictable. You pass by the yum cha place and see two old women coughing. It makes you cough as well.

You know that dream where you’ve left the house and you’ve forgotten to change from the clothes you fell out of bed with? That’s you today.

Hooded top: $25
Can of tuna from which the stains on the hooded top came from: 99c
Shorts: $12
Thongs: $1.50
Getting out of bed and walking straight out the door: ….

Somewhere along the line, you stopped caring, didn’t you?

Nobody’s gonna die just because you go out not wearing shoes.

It’s hard to not talk to anyone. There was so much noise and yet none of it has anything to do with you. You slip in and out of the crowds. You feel alone. You’re a nobody. Most people don’t notice you. And if they do, they will forget within seconds.

It’s incognito without needing to be. Dishevelled without a cause.

It feels mildly depressing. You’re mildly angry.

Whatever.

Here’s the thing. Certain scenery, the right weather, the right company and you’ll think you’ve seen heaven. A combination of darkness and certain sounds can make you fear. Passing a certain restaurant can make you hungry. Mood lighting can make you fall in love.

The heart wants what the heart wants. Or so it goes.

But sometimes what you might think is your heart speaking may just be your arse. And the arse always wants what the arse wants. And you’ll go with it. And then clean up after it.

That’s just the way it always goes.